Saturday, 31 January 2015
Another not unpleasant pill to swallow....
A 4th pill has been added to my collection...because why not!
Went to Watford General on Friday for the last time. It's not the last time I'll be seeing the specialist, but the last time I'll be going to Watford's. From now, I'll be going to Hammersmith hospital which actually has a fully funded renal department. I've been going there for 3 years so....bit of a shock to the system as it was the end of an era for me...
Usual general update, though this time, I informed him that breathing is becoming harder for me: a thicker sensation than usual with tightness at the chest, an active feeling of not getting the full oxygen supply I need.
So my doctor looked at the X-Ray from my physical assessment and, much to my embarrassment, confirmed no trace of Pleural Effusion. Embarrassment because I hate self diagnosing, but considering I'd forgotten to mention the lack of breathe until that appointment, in my desperation, I'd looked online for possible causes and this matched up. So...my bad. I do not in fact have PE.
Tom has now banned me from medical websites which I've been consulting more and more in the build up to my op. Given my embarrassment at doing the one thing I said I'd never do and did in subconscious panic...yeah fair play.
What I have...is failing kidneys. In my case, it's a sodium issue. Yes, the doctor told me I can eat more salt, but apparently it's not enough anymore. My body doesn't retain sodium which means it doesn't do the required oxygen conversion it actually needs to...y'know...live.
So...I'm now on Sodium Bicarbonate pills....4 times day.
As I took the first 2 of the day, I realised that if I need to pop them 4 times a day, I need to carry them with me AND might not have water to hand so need to take them without assistance. It seems after watching episode after episode after episode of House (I'm now on S5 episode 23), I'm slowly starting to emulate House himself: I'm ill, mildly irritable on my worst days and I've started popping pills to ease my discomfort.
Yup. Just gimme an IVF I can use as a walking stick, take away any social anxiety and any social filters, give me the fast working brain of a genius....and you won't be able to tell us apart.
Another way of looking at this is that I'm slowly but surely warming my body up for the packs of pills I'll need to take in the future (it's going to be a lot): I started on 2 (blood pressure control and vitamin D) plus the injections for anaemia, rose to 3 with Anti-Depressants and now a 4th to help me breathe....my 4th musketeer. Technically there were 3, but yeah. Technically...the Anti-depressant works more on the chemical reactions of the brain not my body. So I guess that's the 4th musketeer.....huh.....
Now the main question is, have the pills worked? That's a big yes. I've still got a slight tightness in my chest, but even Tom's observed that I'm happier and busier around the house again...because I can breathe with more ease.
On top of that, I've realised this may also help subdue my anxiety attacks which have risen in frequency again...because I can take deep breathes again. So that's a plus.
I'll admit, I've been fairly blase about my pills in the past, and although I had alarms, had a bad habit of pressing 'snooze'. However, now I've got one which helps me breathe, I've set up 6 alarms my phone:
1) regular daily pills
2) same pills but on the weekend (set at a later time)
3) 1st new pill of the day
4) 2nd new pill
5) 3rd new pill
6) 4th new pill
It's now kind of helping me get in the habit of keeping an eye on my meds....now because I've not going to be able to miss the post op ones I'll be given to...y'know...keep me alive...
An interesting side note: discussing the latest symptoms, my specialist mentioned that as these had arisen, we'd now start looking into a transplant for me on a more urgent basis. So....good thing I have one lined up now.
8 days til Admission
9 til surgery