Seems, as I have a habit of trying to shrug off the mental stuff in a bid to keep me moving forward, my body takes over the responsibility of dealing with the negative. For example, when I was informed my last two donors didn't come up as compatible, I was hit with gradual fatigue, a headache and a pain on the right side of my face the next day. Then my glands decided to swell for 3 days after.
Physical reactions to bad health news (which is apparently completely normal for someone in my situation) seem to happen consistently, so I decided enough was enough and went to see my counsellor, resulting in one of the best sessions I've had in a while.
Hadn't realised how swamped I was with neurosis and other thoughts, whilst all the important stuff was left jostling for my attention at the back.
Feeling triumphant, I decided to go for a swim on Wednesday as, despite my previous blog on the importance of exercise, I'd started to procrastinate as I was constantly tired, ill or just couldn't face setting everything up each time. Last time I exercised properly was back in January and I felt awful so stopped for a bit, then never had the energy to go back to it.
So gentle swimming will replace that.
I woke up on Wednesday to find that my stomach wanted to develop a closer acquaintance with the bucket.
Luckily there was no pain, just fatigue. I was fine by the evening so I suspect it was just stress going bye bye in the most uncomfortable way possible.
So today, Thursday, I went 'no...screw you...I'm going to swim'. The trip also included a 10 minute walk each way...well a little longer today cos I got lost.
The swim itself felt....amazing. The water was lovely and I found myself meditating through the routine: inhaling through the nose, exhaling through the mouth to moderate my breathing and focusing on what I was doing and nothing else.
Oof, I didn't want to stop! I only did because after 10 - 15 minutes I started feeling out of breath and knew I had to walk back.
I decided to use that renewed energy for Kidney Research UK stuff, which I'd been struggling to do as my head hasn't been in the best place recently.
Kidney Research UK update:
- My distribution leaflets arrived so am writing up a note I plan to put in each of them, introducing myself as the Community Champion Volunteer (including a new e-mail: CommunityChampionVolunteer@gmail.com)
- the charity is setting up a number of walks around the UK and, as I don't think the walk itself is suitable for me, will be cheering those who are walking on. Received my kit the other day which includes a flag and a noise maker! Yay!
- Remember that post I wrote about Joni and Dana's story and puppet show, Buttons? I'm now collaborating with Joni so we can put together our own show to raise awareness towards kidney failure.....with puppets!!
Plus holiday with mum next week then helping out at larp after that!
Yes, sounds like a lot, but most of it will involve sitting down and just using brain power rather than too much movement lol
So much yay!