Friday, 7 November 2014
I'm on top o' the world, ma!
I had a specialist appointment today. Seems I've now got to wait for my donor to be contacted by the donor team or the donor team will contact me....or something. I believe when people have contacted those they need to, my donor and I then have to sit down and arrange a date....or something.
What I'm explaining here is what I know. It's kind of out of my hands at the moment.
But I'm not particularly bothered or worried because I'm currently the literal definition of 'the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak'.
As my depression has now been fully lifted, I'm now basically back to my old self. If a touch more hyper. I didn't realise just quite how long this depression and anxiety had been on my shoulders....or just how heavily, until recently. Which is when I sought help. I'm like a completely different person....well...me...again.
So, I have all the buzzing eagerness and energy ever! Then I do stuff and accidentally push myself and end up wiped. Which means I have to take care. Which means I HAVE ALL THE ENERGY IN THE WORLD EVER and if I try and sit still and stay calm, I twitch.
Apparently the twitching and tremors are also part of the renal failure and something I need to keep monitored. But otherwise....
In good news, however, I now seem to find everything hilarious. Watching a comedy program the other day nearly killed me because I was laughing so hard. And yesterday I sent a photo to Tom for a laugh and found it so amusing, I couldn't look at his messenger group without bursting into a fit of uncontrollable giggles.
It's really nice!
Yes I do still have the odd dark thought and yes I do still suffer moments of anxiety, but, as my GP said: as long as the good days out-weight the bad, then the drugs are doing their job. And I've got to remember I am still going through a difficult time, of which I'll still be reminded every so often.
But....as long as I can face those reminders with a smile on my face.....then I'll be fine. For real this time.